The Psychology of Guilt

Guilt exists as a fabricated emotion. It holds little orconditioned to feel guilt by very well-meaning people.
no realness. It's hard to call it a real emotion.Those who loved and cared about us the most were
You see, a real emotion is one that has both athe ones we learned guilt from.
positive and a negative side.Thus, guilt is often intertwined with love. Or rather,
Love, fear, hate, anger, sadness, happiness and soit's intertwined with our conception of love. We all
many other emotions all have both a positive and ahave strongly-defined, deeply-entrenched beliefs and
negative component. Not guilt.attitudes and assumptions about love.
Guilt is all negative. It adds nothing to your existence.Often times, guilt seems almost inseparable from
Sure, many people use it as a motivator:love. Especially when we're afraid of love and afraid
"I'll feel guilty if I don't do this."of losing love, we'll surround our love with guilt.
It's called an 'expedient motivator'. Meaning, it's usedBecause it's much 'safer' to feel guilt than to feel
when you lack principle-based motivation. It's a cheaplove.
way to inspire action in yourself and others.It takes courage to love. While guilt sometimes
Guilt basically comes down to manipulation. Thesurrounds love, fear always surrounds love. True love
function - the purpose - of guilt involves manipulatingalways brings up fear. Not because that's the nature
yourself and others to take some sort of action orof love, but because that's the nature of our society.
to feel some sort of way.It also takes courage to stand up to your
Guilt punishes. Both yourself and those around you.assumptions and question them. Very few have that
Guilt contributes nothing. It only takes.courage. Fortunately, all the courage you need is
So why do we feel it?already available to you. That's the nature of courage.
We've been taught and conditioned to feel guilt.All you have to do is open up and let it in. Then...
Often, by well-meaning, loving, authority figures in ourGuilt can be ended.
lives. Guilt becomes a substitute for love.Guilt serves no useful purpose. It's a distraction from
Unfortunately, guilt dissipates quickly. It has a shortyour true feelings. It separates you from yourself.
half-life. It turns into resentment. So if you'reIt's a cheap way to punish and a cheap way to
manipulating another with guilt - attempting to makemotivate yourself. Guilt manipulates you and others.
them feel guilty - they will resent you.When you find yourself feeling guilty, the key is to
Because guilt often comes down to anger you don'tgo beyond it:
have a right to have.What am I not wanting to feel?
For example: if we're arguing, but I know you're rightWhat am I hiding from?
and I'm wrong, then I don't have a right to getBy asking yourself these types of questions you can
angry. So I might feel guilty instead.start breaking free of the habit - the pattern - those
To work with guilt, first understand the psychologyneurological pathways of least effort that lead
of guilt:straight to guilt. Then you can get in touch with
It's a substitute emotion when you're unwilling to feelwhat's real.
what you're really feeling.The knee-jerk reaction to feel guilt can be replaced
When you're feeling guilty, you're not in touch withwith the natural order of feeling what's real.
your true feelings.That's how you deal with the psychology of guilt.
Secondly, understand we've been taught and