| When we are operate only from our lower three | | | | we will feel lighter and more joyful. If the person |
| chakras we are very egocentric. We are the center | | | | deliberately hurt us and we hang onto the grudge |
| of our own universe. We are the only player in our | | | | they win again and again. Do you really want that? |
| own drama and take everything personally. We see | | | | This is your life we are talking about. Don't you owe |
| things in terms of "what's in it for me". Life is black | | | | it to yourself to make it as happy and joyful as you |
| and white. (Find out more about chakras and how to | | | | can? Why destroy your life by a thoughtless act of |
| work with them for personal development at | | | | another person. You are better than that. I know |
| As we move into the heart chakra we find that we | | | | you are. And honestly the best revenge is being |
| can take a breather from our own self-importance. | | | | happy. |
| We start to recognize that there are things | | | | Some people have the mistaken belief that they |
| happening around us of which we are no part. If the | | | | have to hang onto the pain so they will not let |
| person at the grocery store is in a bad mood we do | | | | themselves be hurt again. This only makes for a life |
| not spend the rest of the day in a huff or wondering | | | | full of misery. Sure, they might not let anyone hurt |
| what we did to them. We can simply acknowledge | | | | them again but they will also be cutting themselves |
| that they are having a bad day and get on with the | | | | off from a lot of wonderful experiences. A better |
| rest of our day. | | | | attitude to take is to learn from their experience and |
| So what does all that have to do with forgiveness? | | | | forgive. Then trust themselves that from a place of |
| Everything! You see it is very rare that someone | | | | openness and wisdom that they will know what to |
| coldly and calculatingly sets out to hurt us. Usually | | | | do if they are ever faced with a similar experience. |
| their actions come from thoughtlessness and not a | | | | If you want to forgive someone simply have the |
| deliberate act to harm you. We all have our faults | | | | intention of letting go of your hurt and forgiving |
| and failings as well as our good points. It is all part of | | | | them. Then sit quietly and flood green into your heart |
| being human and playing this game we call life. | | | | chakra. This may take minutes, hours, days or |
| If someone has hurt us or let us down it is probably | | | | weeks. You might get rid of it and it may come back |
| because of their own insecurities and lack of self | | | | again. If so, start again. The feelings of hurt will pass |
| worth. They are not trying to hurt you but make | | | | and boy will you feel great. Just do it as often as |
| themselves feel better about themselves. For | | | | you need to. |
| example, if a spouse has an affair it is usually | | | | Spend five minutes twice a day flooding green in |
| because they are desperately searching for | | | | your heart chakra until you can think of the person |
| something to bolster their flagging egos. It is not to | | | | without pain. This does not mean that you have to |
| hurt their spouse. They are trying to find something | | | | have an abusive person in your life. You can forgive |
| they fear is missing in their life. (This is not to say | | | | someone but not want any contact with them |
| that I am condoning affairs in anyway or that you | | | | because you know that you are better off without |
| should stay or leave a partner who has cheated on | | | | them. This is valid and does not mean that you are |
| you. That is entirely up to you.) | | | | holding a grudge. |
| When we come from the heart chakra we can take | | | | You can forgive those that have passed away. |
| a step back and not take things so personally. We | | | | However, if it is a long-term grudge be prepared for |
| can take a look at what has happened and why. | | | | a bit of an emotional time while you do so. |
| Then we can decide what we wish to do about a | | | | You may feel guilty for not having forgiven them |
| situation without getting all caught up in the emotion | | | | while they were still alive, or grief at their passing |
| of it. | | | | that you have not allowed yourself to feel before. |
| No matter what, when someone has hurt us, | | | | This is an important part of the process and just be |
| deliberately or otherwise, we need to forgive them, | | | | willing to allow yourself to sit with the pain. Keep |
| for our own piece of mind. Hanging onto a grudge will | | | | working with the heart chakra and these feelings will |
| only make us sad and bitter people. It can run our | | | | subside. The final step in the process is to forgive |
| immune systems down and can even make us | | | | yourself for not forgiving them when they were |
| susceptible to diseases like breast cancer. | | | | alive. |
| When we forgive someone it lifts a burden from us, | | | | |